THE FIRST THING
Today we went on a day at Wrest Park where it was (not all of it, but most of it) St. George's. Elise came too. First we got the best front row seats so that we could see everything. We then waited 5 minutes till some archers and cannon-people came onto the large piece of grassy ground. On the other side some French knights came along. They were much more armoured and had loads of tools – much more than the cannon-people and the archers. Those people were really poor and had no armour or anything, but they were very good and well-trained ESPECIALLY. There was a little boy who looked about my age in the archer group. Then they shot at the Frenchies, but the French didn't care. They just kept walking slowly towards the archers and cannons. BANG BANG BANG! The cannon shot, aiming smoke and fire-balls at the knights. One by one they pretended to die, collapsing and pretending to be electrecuted. The last ones kept marching on, and then the fight began. Eventually, only 2 knights were left…then…one…then…then…the poor had won! They had – completely, truely, really the poor people won!
THE EXPLORE
After the fight, me, Tilly and Elise ran off to explore. We then came to a steep hill, and it went rolly-down, straight (leading to another slope), and then it did that 3 more times – bomp, straight, bomp, straight, bomp, straight, bomp, staight. "Done yet?" "Perhaps it's just another straight bit." "Yep, it is." "Oh no, it's not." "Where shall we go now? Oh – Lavinia's gone down again. May as well too." "Is it done yet, Elise?" "Nope." "Okay." "I'm coming after you, Matilda!" "Aaagh! Don't, don't, aaagh – ow ow ow! William, you weigh a tonne!" "Oh. Ooopsy daisy. Tilly, will you -" "OW! He weighs more than a tonne, at least three!" "What happened, did he fall on you?" "No, I most certainly did not even touch her!" "William, don't lie! You rolled over me, tell her that!" "Okay, just joking. Sorry, not! Joking, just kidding -" And before he finished his sentence, he realised that everybody was glaring at him, and if not, laughing their own heads off. Blller……(pronnounced: bla-err). "Yes, the most exciting and pleasant expression, Mummy. Thank you. Ahem! When I say those two words 'thank' and 'you' you have to react by saying, clearly, mummy, 'the love approches my heart.' And if you do, after that you can say anything – even if it's rude. Because, after all, you said that the love approched your heart, which is bounced onto me. Yes -" "Go and play, darling. Don't over talk yourself, princess. Thank you." "The love approches my heart. Wait – were you listening to that?" "Whoo, St. George and his horse have appeared! whooo, whooo!" "Don't bother. Hey, why you carrying me?!" "Took too long talking, I'm afraid."
I'M GUNNA ALMOST BREAK MY BODY IN HALF, AUDIENCE!
Then, Mummy collected us and shooed us to a massive crowd. We squished past the people and took spaces at the front. A man with baggy trousers and no top on came on the stage, followed by a young jester. The man with no top on put down a bed of very sharp nails. Then he picked a man called Tim and told him to wait by the nails. Then, the man lay down on the nails – ! – no top on too! "Tim," he said, "Get the jester to stand ontop of me, pushing my bare back into the nails." Then Tim got the jester to stand on top of him and then he sat back down. Then the jester stood off Rob (the no-top-on man) and put two large rock hard and heavy plates of stone on him…then he got a hammer and smashed them in half!!
After that, me and Elise and Tilly and William went by ourselves to watch some hawks and falcons. They took three volunteers, one at a time, a boy, girl and another boy. Aisha (pronnounced: eye-ee-sha) was one, Henry was one and Ben was the other. Henry came on first, put a small glove on, held some meat and a hawk landed on his hand. Then came Aisha. She did the same. Then Ben came on. He was given a long string with some pork tied on the end and was told to hold it and run as fast as he could. A falcon (specially trained) swooped down, caught the meat, luckily not Ben, and munched happily. Yum yum yum! But unfortunately they lost the falcon!
Then we watched another show. A load of villagers were piled up in huddles like penguins, and then – STOMP STOMP! (In real life, the monster did actually do this): A dragon came along, and smoke and fire came out of it's mouth and nostrils…The villagers ran. Gallop, gallop! What was that noise? Trumpets tooted, flags were waving, the gallop noise got louder…"Who's that? Help us, cowboy!" "That's no cowboy, that's a specially trained one -" "Wait! It's St. George, ain't it! George, come save our lives! Mist, that's the horse! Eh, Misty and George, come save our lives from this dragony thing!" And George did. He poked him with his spear and pointed it to the air, yelling, "All hail St. George, all hail St. George!" The others yelled it too.
Next up was jousting. Two men on horses came, Team Red and Team Navy. They galloped to eachother, breaking their jousting-sticks and saying, "hail me, hail me!" Then speakers approched and shouted…"Red has one! Chear for Red, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls!" The Red poked his jouster into the air and shouted, "Hail for Red!"
Then it was jester time. He was very funny. He took 5 volunteers, Harriet (the funniest one, who was only about 4), Georgina, Ben, Rob, and someone who's name I can't remember so let's call her Isabelle. He did firey tricks like eat fire and put flames of it up his nostrils. Eww. Then he got Rob to do it, but he burnt his hand. He lineds them up of order Rob, Isabelle whatsit, Georgina, Harriet and Ben. He told Harriet to stand where she was meant and she turned round and said jokingly, "No." So he said, "Ben, Isabelle, Harriet, Georgina and Rob." Then Harriet said, "No, I'm Harriet." So she swapped places with Georgina and the jester said, "Ben, Isabelle, Georgina, Harriet and Rob."
Then it was The Henry VIII Story. I got volunteered as Anne Boleyn. I had a special crown, a white one, and I had to marry Henry. In the end he didn't like me, so the exicutioner came and chopped my head off. Elise was Jane Seymore. William was a spanish army-fighter, and the English wanted to join in too, so William had to say, "No way hosay!" And started fighting again. Goodbye!