When I was about four or five, I was shopping in Tesco with Mummy one day. But a thought came across me. I asked, “Mummy, where do they sleep?”
Mummy had no idea what I was talking about, so she said, “Who?”
“The Blue People. They’re always here…but where do they sleep? Do they have beds?”
I gazed around at the Blue People – they were everywhere. Stacking shelves, climbing up ladders, in and out of these flappy doors, bringing out slabs of wood…and all those trolleys they carried…it was all so weird.
“Er…in their houses, I should expect.”
“But what about that sign? The one that says ‘Open for twenty-four Hours’? They won’t be able to sleep at night!”
I imagined that out the back of Tesco there were rooms full of bunkbeds where the Blue People slept. And they had drawers and drawers full of blue clothes, blue dresses, blue socks, blue leggings, blue t-shirts, blue shoes and blue hairpins. They probably had rooms where they sat and ate lunch, breakfast and dinner. Then they would come out from the doors and into the shop to do their work. They were like blue oompa-loompas.
“Umm….well, you’ll see later on in life…I think…”
And that was that. And today, and today, after THREE LONG YEARS, I finally got to go through those doors and see where the Blue People live. Because Mummy took us to a Tesco ‘Farm to Fork’ trail which is where school groups and home-ed groups get to go ‘behind the scenes’ to see how Tesco works. Even Tesco get to tell you how brilliant it is and why you should shop there.
First, one of the Blue People who was wearing a badge saying ‘Jennifer’ showed us through the doors and upstairs to a small classroom. I thought we were going to do some experiments of where our food came from or something, but apparantly not. There was lots of fruit and veg on the tables – pomegranite seeds, strawberries, blueberries, carrots, all sorts. We were given some worksheets on a clipboard and were urged out of the room. We went back down the steps and found ourselves back in the shop – with all the Blue People! They were in all milimetre spots, squeezing past the Cheese Blue People to the Fish Counter where they began picking apart mussels, plucking out mackerel eyes – bler! Not me!
We had to walk around the shop listing some fruit and vegetables. I found it a bit easy, but it was okay. I mean, I’d go if I was forced to, and I’d go if I had the oppertunity to instead of lounging around at home. But still.
We even headed into the eye-blasting cold freezer (-25 degrees Celsius); a huge room, full of different pies and yoghurts – we were like ants in cardigans in Antarctica. Me and Tilly forced Mummy in – she was a Mummy ant in a coat in Antarctica. Everything was freeeeeeeezing, huuuuuuuuuge, and most of all…had about three people in it. This must be where the Blue People store their frozen food.
We were showed to the Cheese Counter where Jennifer gave us some cheese – Five Counties Cheese. We were tricked that we were to be given five cheeses, but just a small tray of one! This must be where the Blue People buy their food to eat for dinner if they don’t want to go to the cafe (pretend that was one of those funny Es.) I asked if I could eat some Cambozola, but she said yes and then ran off.
Then we went to the Bakery. We saw all the machinery and MORE BLUE PEOPLE. A lady there was baking some hot cross buns, but her gloves were SO dirty! Filthy! Inconvenient! (Whatever that means).
We were then led upstairs into the classroom again to eat some fruit 😉 When we were walking past, there was a door saying COLLEAGUE’S CAFE. I was right – they do have cafes to eat from!!
Then, in the classroom, there was suddenly LOADS of bowls of fruit and veg – carrots, tomatoes, pinapple, mango, pomegranite seeds – loads. We were asked, “Who’s eaten a strawberry before?” What a weird question! Unless you’re a baby or a fussy-pots, you’ve eaten a strawberry before!! Definitely! (If you are a fussy-pots, eat strawberries – they’re real tasty). Then we got a goody bag each with a pear, our worksheets and a water bottle in it.
It was very interesting going behind the scenes at Tesco. They didn’t show us their beds, though 😉